Tuesday, 11 August 2015

Cuts for a cause: This hair donation drive helps cancer patients smile again





The onset of summer promises many new looks, but how many people can say that they switched up their style for a cause?
More than a few, actually. Yesterday, at the KMC Sports Complex, around 30 young girls cheerily came for a small hair donation drive titled 'Hair to Help', which was arranged by Pakistan Youth Forum (PYF). The charity organisation pledges to make wigs out of the donated hair and give them for free to cancer patients. Two stylists from Peng's Hair And Beauty Clinic were present to do the cutting, so all the volunteers were at ease that their hair were in good hands.
Although the heads-up for the event was given on Facebook weeks ago, not many people showed up to donate their hair on the breezy afternoon.

Hearing about 'Hair to Help'

Syed Fahad Ali from PYF explained the idea behind the initiative and said that one major reason behind the drive was to combat lack of awareness: “We started ‘Hair to Help’ in 2012 because this practice, which is quite common in other countries, is unheard of in Pakistan. There is no setup or support programme of this nature. This is the third hair donation drive we’ve organised, after drives in Karachi and Islamabad in 2012.”
Shahid eyes precision as he cuts one participant's hair. — Photo by Yumna Rafi
He further expanded on the need of the drive: “Synthetic wigs are available at cheaper prices [than natural hair wigs], but they can cause rashes on the scalp and also look unnatural. Wigs made out of human hair are really expensive, ranging from Rs15,000 to Rs20,000."
Confusion and misconceptions:
Unfortunately, despite their good intentions, the PYF has to battle misperceptions about the hair donation drive:
“When we started off, we did not get a positive response and some people were critical of the practice because there is a prevalent belief that hair donation is unacceptable in religion," Fahad tells Dawn.com, "Nevertheless, there are also many of those who are passionate about the cause and never fail to disappoint. We have provided wigs free of cost to about 25 people, most of whom are women above 30 as well as girls under 12.”
Maria smiles as Inder, the stylist gets done with the haircut. — Photo by Yumna Rafi
Given that such causes normally draw a large number of volunteers, especially from medical colleges, Fahad's next revelation was a shocker: Many medical colleges did not allow promotion of the event because they didn’t deem it acceptable.
Therefore, PYF is on the lookout for a fatwa (Islamic ruling) and have consulted one cleric regarding the Islamic position on hair donation. They hope this will help them get more donors in future drives.
In addition to the misperception about hair donation, another problem encountered by PYF is the high cost of producing the wigs.
A single wig is usually made with hair given by atleast six people and the production takes around two to three days. “There are no companies that make original wigs in Pakistan. There used to be one years ago, but it closed down due to unknown reasons,” shared Fahad.
Fahad then searched for neighbouring countries that would assist him and found a company in Chennai that agreed to make it for Rs1000 per wig. “It was all going well till the customs started charging us an exorbitant amount on each wig and started stopping our deliveries.”
The team then found a vendor in China who agreed to make it at the same cost. “There were no custom charges, so we have been dealing with them alone.”

Styling for support

Shahid busy in the final cuts. — Photo by Yumna Rafi
Hair stylists Shahid and Inder Gori, who have trained at Toni and Guy and currently work for Peng’s Salon, said that they signed up for the hair donation drives for free because of the cause.
“I feel this is the best way to help someone because we are healthy beings and we need to feel their pain too,” said Shahid.
It was interesting to notice that a mother who came with her daughter and niece voluntarily did the cutting for many of the young girls because she was a beautician herself.
“I feel extremely happy when I voluntarily cut hair. The reason I got up voluntarily was because of the cause. All of us deserve to smile. It’s not like only healthy people have the right to smile and feel happy. I think one should help others in their own capacity and share happiness," she said.
Given that people were keen to know more about hair donation, will they hold another drive anytime soon? Fahad said they might: “The ideal time is March or April because the summers have just begun and people usually go for a haircut.”

Looking hip for a cause

Maria and Rutaba pose with their certificates of participation. — Photo by Yumna Rafi
Most of the volunteers were young girls, who were happy to give away at least 12 inches of their hair for the noteworthy cause. “Guys normally don’t have long hair here but some shave their heads to show support to the patients," Fahad shared with a laugh.
The young girls playfully sported their short bobs in turn:
“When you cut your hair short, people usually question why. So when they’d ask me, I’ll tell about this cause and thus raise awareness,” said Rutaba Tariq, who is currently a student.
“I found out through Facebook about this initiative. As soon as I learned about it, I just knew I had to do this,” said 16-year-old Maria Yousuf.
But not everyone in her circle shared the same sentiments, “I sent the invite to my friends and they made excuses, saying they loved their hair too much. One even declined to come outright,” said Maria, shaking her head in disbelief.
Saba Us Saba cuts off hair of a participant. — Photo by Yumna Rafi
Her mother stands over her, smiling as her daughter excitedly gets her hair cut. “My only concern was where the hair would be sent. We hear so often about hair being used for magic and other illegal purposes like hair extensions, it makes us parents worry.”
Overlooking the proceedings is another volunteer who has been actively taking part in the cause since the past two years. Thirty-one-year-old Eleen Fernandes confidently answers parents’ queries and assures those who still had some last minute doubts.
“I gave my hair for the first time two years ago. When I came back home my mother-in-law looked at me and said ‘Haye beta!’. It took some time for everyone to get used to it,” said a grinning Eleen. “But when you see pictures of happy women wearing the wig made from your hair, that feeling is incomparable.”
For many of the participants, the best part of the drive is to receive pictures of those who had been helped. “We send the patient’s pictures with their wigs to all the donors but it is done privately to protect their privacy,” said Fahad. “We are strictly against making it viral, this isn’t a business but an honorary cause.”

Sunday, 9 August 2015

How to deal with a home emergency while you're away



Let’s examine the following two situations and what you should do to minimise damage:

Q: My young child is home during the day with the maid and an elderly relative. What can I can teach the child in case of an emergency at home?
Children who are capable of understanding the severity of an emergency and can speak clearly should be taught to alert an adult if they notice something has happened in the home:
  • If anyone in the home needs assistance then they should be able to inform the other adult at home.
  • If the other adult is unable to respond or support then teach them to dial your phone number from a landline phone.
  • Keep a list of emergency numbers that they can easily read and tell them to use certain key words, HELP, Come Home.
    The language must be such that you instantly recognise the urgency.
    If you receive the call from that particular number, ensure you
    answer it.

    Have the child regularly recite your number and make them call you occasionally to test their knowledge and to show them that you respond.
  • If all else fails, the child could be taught to go to the door and scream for help loudly enough to be heard by the neighbours or a passerby.
  • If regular medication is needed by the elderly relative, then ensure a child of an appropriate age (who understands not to consume any medication) is able to either help retrieve it or then show the other adult present where it is kept. This is particularly vital if you have a new maid who may not be familiar with the interior of the house, etc.

Security and safety of children and adults is of vital importance; any untoward incident can take place while you are not around.


It is important for you to know what are the most likely emergency scenarios that could occur, based on the age of those at home, medical needs, security situation in your area, fire safety and primarily, the capability of your child.
Thereafter, make fun activities for the children to practice all through the year, such as scavenger hunts and always reward them when they’ve made the right decision.

Q: I live in a different city from my elderly parents who live alone and have domestic help that comes during the day. What are some of the key safety and security considerations to keep in mind?
The aim should be to make it easy for them to do anything in an emergency and for you to know they need assistance:
  • Give someone trustworthy who resides within the same area, if possible, or in the same city, the keys to the house, only to be used in emergency.
  • Have someone visit them weekly or at a convenient time with the following tasks:
    Report back to you on their physical well being.
    Ask them if they need assistance with any maintenance works at the home (electrical, plumbing, utilities, etc).
    Replenish their medication that is consumed regularly.
    Provide any financial needs support (take them to the bank, pay bills, etc).
  • There are several services that now provide home delivery for groceries, medication and other daily needs that you can subscribe to and prepay or transact online.
  • Keep a contact list with your number in prominent place written / printed in a large font, clearly mentioning your relationship (son, daughter, etc).
  • Have a landline phone active that can be easily accessed from the bedroom.
  • Instruct the domestic help to contact the person who you’ve tasked to check on them to contact as and when needed and to escalate to you.
  • Have some form of communication with them on a daily basis or a very regular basis, be it calls, video chats, text messaging. A video call chat regularly will also help you recognise any physical frailty.
  • If they have mobility issues ensure they have support in the form of physical equipment, such as wheelchairs, bars on the walls in the bathrooms to hold on to.
  • Always place daily use items at a level they can easily reach without the need for aid of others or equipment like stepping stools that aren’t sturdy.
  • Security panic alarms can be installed through vendors who cover the area who will ensure you are informed as well.
  • Security cameras are available that have remote monitoring which allow you to check 24/7/365 from anywhere, including mobile devices.
  • If there’s a need for regular medical checks or medication contract a nurse or doctor who can visit appropriately and is available for emergencies.
As with the previous case, it is important for you to know what are the most likely emergency scenarios that could occur based on the age of those at home, medical needs, security situation in your area. Make a plan to address these, but foremost have the means of checking on them yourself or by someone trustworthy.
Published in Dawn, Sunday Magazine, August 9th, 2015

Saturday, 8 August 2015

At the Indie Craft Show, differently-abled artists get a welcome boost




 Gone are the days when 'arts and crafts' were considered an acceptable pastime only for the very young or very old.
A recently held mini-expo proved that, as Karachi's ‘Indie Art and Craft Show’ held last Sunday at Clifton Marquee drew in a crowd. The event saw many Karachiites up and about in the afternoon, forgoing their siestas to bag some quirky clothes or some statement stationery from over 80 stalls.

What is the Indie Art and Craft Show?

The force behind the show, Varah Mussavir the Firefly, who looks after the Crafters Guild shared how the Indie show is a spin-off of sorts of the larger Crafter’s Expo: “The Indie Arts and Crafts Show is a smaller sister show of the annual Crafter’s Expo and that too has expanded a lot. The Indie started last year and it leans more towards honouring independent artists.”
 “People were keenly interested and kept asking us to do it again so we made it an annual thing, which wasn’t the intention when we began. We have two guidelines for participants: that the presented craftwork should either be designed by them, or someone from their team or workshop does the work so that you’re in some way contributing to the design process. We have a lot of variety this time and we have people from Lahore, Bhit Shah and Balochistan so people do like to come together and celebrate crafts this way,” she added.
 Indie artists independently set up shop at home, marketing their goods on Facebook and selling them through online payments and countrywide delivery services.
 “Most of them don’t have affiliations with organisations or larger art platforms. They usually are students or homemakers who work from home. I believe that 97 or 98 percent of them are selling their stuff from home. We try to help them by asking them to share their posts and market them properly.”
 Varah shared that artists from interior Sind or Baluchistan approach them after hearing about the event as many artists frequent Commune Art Colony led by designer Yousuf Bashir Qureshi.
She also told Dawn.com that the noted Baloch singer Akhter Channal was able to come to the event through the Baluchistan Peace Forum. Moreover, Pakistan Poverty Alleviation Fund, which caters to about 40 organisations like Indus Crafts Foundation, represents rural crafters looking for a platform to sell their handmade items like bags, kurtas, wallets, key chains etc.
 Divided into home décor, gifts and greetings, party planning, artists at work, craft demos and apparel, the expo also had a small baked goods stall, a photo booth and a section for Team Muhafiz comics.

Our special artsy folks: inclusive not reclusive

With a dearth of exhibitions catering to young, independent artists, it is indeed a convivial sight to see displays of art by those who are largely ignored by the society. Organisations like Family Educational Services Foundation (FSEF), Heartwork, and Banyan Tree connected buyers with the work of those who had auditory or visual impairment or were differently-abled in some other way.
The two Heartwork salespeople, namely Sakhawat and Nafees who was wheelchair-bound, were happily engaging with customers by telling them about their handmade products like bedsheets, cushion covers and apparel designs.
 Little Ummati, a stall selling kits for children who want to learn basics of religion was being looked after by Fasih who bagged a gold medal at theSpecial Olympics in Cricket. His brother said that as it was difficult to set up a different shop altogether, they decided to launch an online one so that he can look after it from home.
 At the Banyan Tree stall, Saba Hassan of the Hassan Trust spoke about how the weaving work is done by those who are visually impaired. The striking handwoven ‘Peacock Chair’ was the centre of attention as it added to the beauty of the stall.
 A home furnishing stall called Paimona was an initiative to support local ceramic artists as all products are made in Pakistan. The owner Sana Khan Niazi stressed on the need to support the handicrafts: “We support the ceramic artists, the woodworks because otherwise they’re unable to sustain themselves in a tough market because of Chinese high-end products that have really destroyed the market for them with no government support, so we aid them in gaining urban knowledge and ethics of the production.”

All the way from Bhit Shah and Balochistan:

Akhter Channal of Danna Pe Danna fame had come all the way from Balochistan. He said that Baloch artists face difficulties in coming to Karachi because it's a long distance from the interior areas where they reside. He added that there are a lot of artists in Makran and Chaghi.
The artiste, accompanied by his young nephew, sold wall-hangings with stitches symbolising different areas of the province.
Some Baloch folk musicians also entertained the attendees and provided a nice background feel to the whole event.
 Indus Crafts Foundation and Lahore-based Ahan also presented handmade items ranging from rilli work and embroidery to terracotta items. Bags, pouches and shirt pieces of ajrak made by local crafters were also displayed at the booths.

Lahore, Lahore Hai:

With Lahorites in the zone, the competition was tough because it appeared that they had brought something not commonly available in the City of Lights: vintage pendents inscribed with song lyrics, band logos or just a plain ‘I <3 Khi’.
Ifrah, who displayed one of the vintage collections, said that although she didn’t go to an art school, she came up with such pendents, key chains, rings, bookmarks and even journals.
 “I am fond of traveling so I came up with these and the reason they seem expensive is that the supplies aren’t so easily available here.”
She laughed at the fact that her ‘I <3 Khi’ rings and pendents sold like hot cakes because the market had many Karachi lovers. At Prism and Paintbrushes, their tiny notepads, stationary items and fridge magnets, especially the Harry Potter themed ones, were quite rad.A truck art-inspired artist had displayed earrings, wall hangings and purses made on metal with designs from truck art. Although the items were pricey, by the end of the day she was already out of stock.

Wednesday, 5 August 2015

Footprints: Khanabadosh: A home for the thought



IT isn’t abuzz with the whir of coffee grinders, the clink of cutlery, or the hum of discordant music and voices; neither do varied aromas launch an assault on the senses. Set deep in the lush Benazir Bhutto Park, radiant with colourful bougainvillea in the quiet precincts of Hyderabad’s Sindh Museum, is the two-month-old Khanabadosh Writers’ Cafe. It is hailed by students, activists, thinkers and academics as a desperately needed oasis of peace and free thought, where the ideal of pluralism is upheld with vim and vigour.
And it tastes of home.
We enter the cool tea room and shut out the searing sun behind us. The interior presents an interesting fusion — it is partly like the library of an ethnic house and partly a no-frills cafe. The door opens into an explosion of red against black and white wallpaper with a brick wall — revolutionary poets and their couplets are imprinted in black on crimson canvases and framed in light wood; bookshelves display classics in English, Urdu and Sindhi. Lounge-like seating in dark cane and red accessories runs along the wall, facing meticulously placed steel tables with padded seats in forest green.
Sindh’s renowned activist and academic, Amar Sindhu, sprung this surprise on her town and pursues her cause with unique enthusiasm and passion. “This is the outcome of relentless hard work and all my resources. I want to see it take the shape of spaces such as the famed Pak Tea House in Lahore and Bombay Hotel in Karachi. We want to reclaim public space for thought and debate, as today our mass narrative is out of control and coloured with extremist views,” says Sindhu as she explains the logic behind her endeavour.
As the temperature lowers, there is a sudden, rising symphony — a photography class begins at one end and the sitting area rings out with Sindhu’s supporters, primarily academics and writers, who speak of their collective vision for Khanabadosh.
“This is a breath of fresh air to keep society alive with liberal philosophy as from the 1970s to the 1990s political debate, awareness and study circles were consistently eroded,” chimes in Farooq Soomro, editor, Sindh Express.
Sindhu elaborates that the opening ceremony on May 17 was a success of unforeseen proportions. “We had hundreds in attendance and the occasion went on till 2:30am. Poetess Rubina Abro was there; Shah Latif’s raag and musicians from Thar were riveting. This was followed by a mushaira where Ayub Khoso, who was jailed for three years on false charges of blasphemy, read his poem on Sindhi Hindu migration, which moistened many eyes. The real surprise came from a daily-wage labourer, Munawar Husain, who presented a most heart-rending elegy, which he repeated on collective insistence,” Sindhu narrates with pride.
She and her core team of allies in the Programme Management Committee — Dr Arfana Mallah, Nasim Jalbani, Haseen Mussarat and Saima Jaffery — maintain that they are bowled over by the fact that there are more students and young people who have become regulars at the facility than older intellectuals.
“We had no idea how much of a necessity such a space was for the youth. Some come here to be heard, some to study, others need a breather from daily routine and some just want to shoot the breeze, air thoughts or even brainstorm with us over a cup of tea,” they say almost in unison.
The most significant advantage that Khanabadosh has over others is that, as it is overseen by women, homebound women from conservative families revel in easy access to it.
The committee mentions that it intends to draft an annual calendar of events on the premises and its aim is to locate overshadowed talent in the hinterland of the country.
“We want to bridge ethnic divides. Hasan Mujtaba’s Urdu book launch was the beginning of this journey and a Sheikh Ayaz mela is also planned. Our intention is to engage social consciousness and the entire civil society in our plans.”
A mere two months old, Sindhu’s vision has already begun to spread. “Inspired by this place, the Sindh culture department has already inaugurated Ajrak clubs in Mirpurkhas, Larkana, Khairpur and Latifabad,” she beams.
Khanabadosh is presently preparing to host a musical evening to fortify religious harmony where the Baha’i, Sikh, Hindu, Muslim and Christian communities will bring their talents into the open.
Think what mainstream hardliners may, history stands witness to the reality that movements of unity borne in spaces of counter-narratives have rarely been easy to quash. These spaces must chisel our social arena before a nation causes its own destruction.

Tuesday, 4 August 2015

Do modern Pakistani TV romances fall short of classics like Dhoop Kinarey?



Mujhe aap ki bahut parvah hai.
That phrase from iconic 80s TV drama Dhoop Kinarey had three generations of women swooning with the younger lot making mental notes on romance. Year's later, Dhoop Kinarey's romantic duo Dr Ahmer (Rahat Kazmi) and fun loving Dr Zoya (Marina Khan) are still one of the most famous romantic couples to grace our screens.
Throughout the 80’s and 90’s we were swept off our feet by some very likeable couples and romantic screenplays in drama serials such as Ankahi,TanhaiyanBandhan and many more. However, the scope for romance has slowly become more and more limited as male protagonists have become villains rather than heroes and our heroines have lost agency and sit weeping in corners, waiting to be rescued.
In the past, marriage and a happy life were once the ending to a story of self-realisation, now the wedding vows mark the beginning of a torturous process of misunderstandings with betrayal lurking around every corner.
Today’s hero is a far cry from Dr Ahmer, he does not waste time judging a woman’s character or personality. Clearly the path to his heart is through his stomach as his main concern is who makes good parathas and the roundestkoftas.
Today’s heroine has also changed: she is weighed down with domestic responsibilities, attacked on all sides and in constant fear of desertion, while carefree and happy are words reserved for the villainous cousin or secret girlfriend. The wonderfully laid back, working woman Aani Khala (Badar Khalil) of Tanhaiyaan would never qualify for a rishta in today’s onscreen climate; her outspoken ways and cooking methods (put the ingredients in a pot and read a book till cooked) would rule her out as wife material immediately.

The scope for romance has slowly become more and more limited as male protagonists have become villains rather than heroes and our heroines have lost agency and sit weeping in corners, waiting to be rescued


Glancing through a list of the most popular dramas of the last few years serials such as Meri Zaat Zara BenishanKhuda Aur MohabbatDaamHumsafar,DastaanZindagi Gulzar HaiAun Zara and more recently Pyarey Afzal stand out as memorable romances. So, what is the modern perspective on romance?
We asked a few of the talented writers and directors behind some of these serials what magic pixie dust they sprinkle to make such scenes work:
Lights, camera, action: the beginning of a romance
According to the talented director of award winning serial Dastaan, Haissem Hussain: “Showing romance on screen is all in the timing. The measuring of looks, space, texture, light, the silence, the right words at the right time. All measured and timed to perfection.” He adds, “It is the creating of tension and then the sudden release from it.”
One of the most unforgettable scenes from Dastaan shows Hassan (Fawad Khan) and Bano (Sanam Baloch) searching the rooftops to catch a glimpse of one another. The beautiful play of light and shadow dancing across the actors faces and in the glow of the lanterns framed by the soft darkness of a moonlit night make this a classic.
What makes it epic is that it isn’t just a romance about lovers who are meant to be together but they are torn apart by events beyond anyone’s control (in this case Partition). The viewer becomes part of their journey and though we want them to find each other, we also see how they have changed.
Samira Fazal who wrote the screenplay for Dastaan says that to write a romance, “a writer has to feel it, and write what comes from the heart. The use of subtle gestures with eyes with less words and no physical touching – because that would ruin it.”
Mean what you don’t say — how our dramas work to show love without action
The absence of the physical is often replaced by that other device — banter.
Dialogue has a strong hand in building the chemistry and relationship between two characters. The back and forth snappy dialogue between couples holds a wealth of implicit meaning that lays the foundation of their relationship. Even in Dhoop Kinarey Dr. Irfan’s (Sajid Hassan) shouted-out proposal to Anji (Kehkishan Awan) is ridiculously romantic.
In Kuch Pyar Ka Pagalpan, which became a cult classic, it was the witty exchange between the four protagonists but especially the chemistry between Shamraiz (Mikaal Zulfikar) and Kiran (Sanam Baloch) that had the audiences guessing the outcome till the very end.
Though sometimes, actions speak louder than words and give us a tangible insight into the characters feelings. It is these actions that we remember as romantic moments. In Dhoop Kinarey, when Dr. Ahmer returns Dr. Zoya’s earrings we realize how he really feels despite the stern talking to he gave her the night before. In Kuch Pyar Ka Pagalpan when Shamraiz spends the whole night waiting up for Kiran to return safely it speaks volumes about his concern for her. In Ankahi, Timmi gives up his true love so that she may have a better life, all bring a lump to our throats and get us teary-eyed.

Subtext is key to how romance plays out in Pakistani dramas. In the absence of physical proximity, the hints of ideas are usually what charges the relationships and the audience interprets what was not said


Poet, writer, director, and (dare we say) renaissance man, Sarmad Sehbai describes romance more earthily: “The way a woman moves says it all and of course, the eyes, which are the only door. It is veiled erotica, the way the actors are shot and directed.”
His much anticipated film Mah-e-Meer is an intense, passionately romantic movie about a modern day poet with a deep psychological connection with the Urdu poet Mir Taqi Mir.
In Mah-e-Meer trailers too we see lead actress Iman Ali as the embodiment of that veiled eroticism in her role as a courtesan. Sehbai acknowledges that thetawaif embodied the cultural metaphor and with the downfall of the Mughal Empire. “There was a loss of beauty and pleasure embodied in courtesan culture.” he says.
However, it is not only veiled eroticism but the hidden subtext that builds the romantic tension as well. From half-acknowledged feelings to never quite spoken but definitely non-platonic relationships, subtext is also key to how romance plays out in Pakistani dramas. In the absence of physical proximity, the hints of ideas are usually what charges the relationships and the audience interprets what was not said.
Simplicity is key: the use of symbols
Romance is not limited to purely to passion. Often times simplicity is just more powerful.
Author Faiza Iftikhar has written her fair share of romantic scenes, and though her recent romantic comedy Aun Zara captured hearts all over the world she says her favourite romantic scene comes from Aik Nayee Cindrella: “When Meesha tells Roman that Mayer, (his rival) has proposed to her, they start looking at each other and only the expressions in their eyes explain their feelings for one another. Romantic dialogues should be simple and touching," she explains. She follows the Jane Austen school of thought encapsulated by Mr Knightley's famous declaration to Emma “If I loved you less I might be able to talk about it more.”
When contemplating classic romance, no discussion could be complete without the queen of contemporary romantic writing, Farhat Ishtiaq. Her mega hit serial Humsafar became a phenomenon, propelling its lead actors into Bollywood and bringing much needed confidence back to Pakistani drama industry beset by the success of Indian and Turkish serials.
“You have to be a romantic at heart, hopelessly romantic, have love for nature, be emotional, oversensitive ...at least this is who I am. I cry, I laugh with my characters and find romance in the most unusual situations even in everyday life” she muses. That very basic connection to nature is often a conduit for romance in the culture of the subcontinent using the summer rain as a metaphor for desire seeking an escape.
“Rain inspires me a lot,” confesses Ishtiaq adding playfully that she can watch it for hours without ever getting bored .The rain scene so beautifully picturised by director Sarmad Khoosat in Humsafar illustrates this perfectly. Khirad’s naivete and her sheer uninhibited joy as she dances in the rain contrast perfectly with her husband Asher’s distant, more guarded position. Ishtiaq’s latest project Diyar-e-Dil is another romantic story which promises a more playful, younger romance than her previous stories.
Khalil Ur Rehman Qamar is renowned for his deeply romantic writing which brings the much neglected male protagonists to the fore. His claim that “ Mohabbat appne gunehgaroon ko kabhi maaf nahin karta” (love never forgives her transgressors) is apparent in his work.

Today, where every second drama is about second wives, third wives or unfaithful men, simple devotion is just as romantic as any flowery speech


Faith, almost blind faith, blended with a fascination for loss and tragedy are recurring themes in his writing. His hugely popular *Pyaray Afzal* and the autobiographical Sadkey Tumhare are bittersweet romances with unhappy endings.
Today, where every second drama is about second wives, third wives or unfaithful men, simple devotion is just as romantic as any flowery speech. InPyaray Afzal, the hero Afzal accepts Farah’s rejection but her hold on him and his own dedication to that dream of love never ends. Similarly in Humsafar, Asher's sitting alone reading a newspaper a few years after Khirad has left makes it clear that he has not conveniently married Sara. This may have been more romantic than all the other more contrived scenes we're shown.

Director Mehreen Jabbar suggests that romance is “all about the things that are unsaid and the silent moments that can create the best romantic scenes.”


Of Khalil sahib’s current drama on-air, Mera Naam Yousuf Hai, director Mehreen Jabbar suggests that romance is “all about the things that are unsaid and the silent moments that can create the best romantic scenes.” This exemplifies another fundamental of subcontinental romance: the unconscious language of romance, where lovers interpret each other’s emotions without speaking.
This subtlety is perfectly translated in Jabbar’s earlier drama Daam, with the 'blink and you'll miss it' quick change of scenes as Junaid insists that Zara wear another gajra at his sister’s engagement, leaving a quiet glow on Zara’s face and the viewers hearts.
This works under the expert guidance of a good director like Mehreen Jabbar, who knows how to edit and shoot actors' expressions to show that unspoken rapport. In less able hands it can be confusing. Numm is a recent example of an emotionally charged story with great actors whose silences were very difficult to interpret.
Unconventional romances: we'd love to see more
Pakistani dramas have never been shy of presenting unconventional romances. Sometimes couples who don't take center stage and more unorthodox romances are definitely a breath of fresh air. The older couple Nusrat (Shamim Hilali) and Mutmain (Syed Mohammed Ahmed) in Coke Kahani, Phopoo (Sabeen Hisbani) and Colonel sahib (Adnan Jaffer) from Aun Zara were adorable.
Here humour was the key, their easy, unqualified acceptance of each other made their romance just as meaningful as any star crossed lovers. More recently the mature relationships in Jackson Heights with Bhatti sahib’s(Nouman Ijaz) and Salma (Ameena Sheikh) worked because you could see the growth that they brought in each other. The beginnings of the relationship between a younger man Jamshed (Adeel Husain) wooing the older Michele (Marina Khan) too was also well done. In each case the screen chemistry was palpable.
The idea that love can heal the deepest wounds is often behind some of the less traditional romances portrayed on our small screens. Writer Zanjabeel Asim Shah’s romances offer surprising combinations. Her recent take on Beauty and the Beast, drama *Bashar Momin,* carried this theme of redemption telling the story of a cruel, psychologically damaged criminal who is transformed by unconditional love.
Similar themes of redemption flow through her stories like Aik Nazar Meri Taraf where two victims of their respective spouses' adultery and infidelity find love and hope in each other. In another story, Saat Pardon Main, she shows a transgender man finding himself through the love of a girl betrayed by another man.
Shah’s adaptation of the classic movie Anjuman also had more romance than the earthier original. Anjuman is no innocent girl but a courtesan used to controlling and manipulating men till she meets a man she actually loves. The wonderful scene picturised by director Yasir Nawaz, where Anjuman asks her disdainful captive Asif “kissi nay aap ki nazar uttari hai?” is hard to forget.
To wrap up, here is a list of our favourite romantic scenes from various TV dramas:
1) Aanch: When the hero declares his absolute faith in his wife’s character despite their impending divorce
2) Anjuman telefilm: When Anjuman asks Asif to leave because of her promise to his bhabi
3) Aun-Zara: Aun and Zara brushing each other’s hair, there is a great deal of implied intimacy involved in such a simple act
4) Bandhan: The “sort of” proposal when the hero played by Nouman Masood keeps asking Nadia Khan’s character “Haa, Ya Naa”
5) Dastaan: When Hassan proposes to Bano: “Mujh sey shadi karogi?"
6) Dhoop Kinarey: The last scene which has all the elements of creating romantic tension and Dr Zoya and Dr Ahmer end up at the same place and he holds her hand and says he won’t let go. Le sigh.
7) Humsafar: Asher takes his reluctant bride Khirad to eat ice cream after a party and notices she is wearing the bracelets he gave her
8) Pyaray Afzal: When Afzal says he knows he is not worthy of Farah but he still has the right to love her
9) Tanhaiyaan: The last scene with Zara and Zain’s voice taking center stage over the chaos of the party in the background and their silence and thoughts (literally) say it all
10) Zindagi Gulzar Hai: Kashaf goes to sleep troubled and alone, only to wake up and find her husband Zaroon has taken the night flight to be with her — perfect.
Romance never goes out of style, no matter how practical or rational we try to be, a simple glance, a haunting melody and a fluttering heart will always be in fashion.